‘Simmer Your Bridges’ Kingston’s Journey #131

Don’t Burn Your Bridges

It is generally unwise to burn bridges. You may be mad at someone and have a real urge to give them a piece of your mind. But once you tell someone off, that’s that/ Don’t expect them to be coming back. That bridge is burned. So as a rule of thumb, generally it is best to keep your mouth shut, even if you have every reason in the world to tell someone off.

And this is because of the big unknown factor of what will happen in the future. There is no way to predict with certainty that you will not be needing them in the future. And how embarrassing would it be to need to come back to someone after having told them to go screw themselves?

Be Less Present

This doesn’t mean that you need to remain buddy buddy with this person that you don’t like, just don’t antagonize it. Instead, begin to distance yourself from that individual, not in a mean spirited way, it’s just a matter of being less present. Don’t burn the bridge, singe it. Keep your distance. Whenever you do see or hear from them, of course be friendly, but then part ways once again.

So whenever (if ever) you need to cross that bridge again, it’s still there/ The fact of the matter is, we can only maintain strong relations with a handful of people, so choose wisely and keep the acquaintances many. And ideally if the time comes when you need one of these acquaintances that you know and hate, whome you’ve been simmering the bridge with, contact them beforehand. Be chummy with them and contact them some time ahead with the illusion of not needing anything from them, perhaps even provide them with something of value that they will prize. That is, mend it before you cross.

A few close friends, many acquaintances

A few business partners, many business acquaintances

Kingston S. Lim

January 14, 2022

Cotonou, Benin

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