Why Guard One and Not the Other?
Whenever someone trespasses on our territory, we balk at the notion of this intrusion. Whenever someone steals from us, we take up arms and defend what we believe to be rightfully ours. But when someone becomes disrespectful with our time, we become so accommodating with such individuals.
We allow others to keep us waiting, or allow them to be so demanding of our time. And we do nothing about it. But is it not time that is the non replenishable resource? Was it not time that allowed us to gather that property and material resource? We should therefore, guard it carefully. Don’t just let anyone in, because it is not about making every friend, but more about making the right friends.
The distinction between the former and the later can be subtle at times, but differentiating between the two is key. And it is also important to note that you yourself must be subtle about it. It will serve you no useful purpose if you tell someone that is of no value to you to go away and stop bothering you. This will only serve to antagonize all those (including the ones you want to be friends with) around you.
Be Selective With Your Time
Instead, it will serve you well to be more discreet about it. Be friendly with everyone, but don’t be everyone’s friend. It’s an uncomfortable truth but a fact that human society is stratified into classes, there are the rich and influential and the poor and destitute. If someone in the later segment tries being too clingy, and demanding of your time and attention. Give subtle cues. Drop hints that you are not interested in being friends, be more distant and less present. And do this early. If you allow them very close to you and try to detach yourself. It will come off as a falling out between you and the other person. Better to keep them off your property and at a distance from the get go. It will require some finesse, but just as property needs to be guarded, so does our time. Don’t let anyone come in and monopolize it.
Kingston S. Lim
September 10, 2021
About Kingston’s Journey Series: Kingston’s Journey is a lifelong series. This is the travel journal I take with me. Whether you have questions such as how to change my life or how to travel the world, I think you’ll find value in the life lessons I’ve experienced and documented in this travel notebook. They may serve as travel inspiration for you. In Chinese, there is a saying, “讀萬卷書,不如行千里路.”
This means, instead of reading ten thousand books, why don’t you walk a thousand miles. This is my inspiration to travel every nation (or as many as possible) in my pursuit of my global MBA by learning as much as possible and recording these life lessons learned only by travel. In the end, I think the achievement of dreams, personal growth & aspirations out there through travel and adventure will lead to a more fulfilling life. Living and experiencing the “now” is how I’ll make my life a great memory in the future.