Falling Back Vs. Falling Forward Kingston’s Journey #90


Pain, Pleasure and the Human Psyche

I believe it has been heavily researched in a number of studies that human beings are much more adverse to feeling pain then they are eager in seeking pleasure. It can be said then, that it is part of human nature that we are very risk adverse.

Building off of that, when we try something new and or difficult, it leaves within us an insecurity that perhaps we are not good enough to make things work.

Perhaps we will hit a brick wall,

Perhaps we will fail and fall flat on our face.

That is a scary prospect for the vast majority of people, again based on the human psyche of being risk adverse. The threat of failure becomes a bug that gets glued to the back of our heads and gives us self doubt. The what ifs plague our minds and leads to us doubting our ability.

The Problem with Falling Back

A very common answer people present to alleviate this insecurity then is to have a backup plan to “fall back on.” Normally this plan B is an inferior options compared to the original plan. That is, things won’t be as good but at least it would be something.

This type of thinking gives people comfort as it provides people with a sense of security to counter the insecurity of failing at what they are doing. The problem comes when people stunt their own potential by having this type of thinking. It leads to a level of comfort that breeds laziness in giving something your all because there is always something to fall back on right? Well this line of logic over a significant time span leads to self sabatoge as one never tries their best and in that way, never attains all they are capable of without there being a fire under their butt to motivate them to do better.

So instead of having a plan to fall back on, put everything you got into what you need to do and if things don’t work out, have a plan to fall forward on. That is, move to something better, if the original plan doesn’t work. That better thing may not seem so originally, but great achievements often start with humble beginnings.

And how can you know what lies ahead until you open that door?

Kingston S. Lim

February 17, 2021

Dar Es Salaam, Tanzania


About Kingston’s Journey Series: Kingston’s Journey is a lifelong series. This is the travel journal I take with me. Whether you have questions such as how to change my life or how to travel the world, I think you’ll find value in the life lessons I’ve experienced and documented in this travel notebook. They may serve as travel inspiration for you. In Chinese, there is a saying, “讀萬卷書,不如行千里路.”

This means, instead of reading ten thousand books, why don’t you walk a thousand miles. This is my inspiration to travel every nation (or as many as possible) in my pursuit of my global MBA by learning as much as possible and recording these life lessons learned only by travel. In the end, I think the achievement of dreams, personal growth & aspirations out there through travel and adventure will lead to a more fulfilling life. Living and experiencing the “now” is how I’ll make my life a great memory in the future.

12 thoughts on “Falling Back Vs. Falling Forward Kingston’s Journey #90

  1. Very well explained. True, we are wired for survival hence spend most of our lives trying to be safe. I never related this to stunting our growth until reading this. Some comforts are bad wen they get into our way towards growth and embracing changes in our lives will help motivate growth.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Very informative post. And you’re spot on, Kingston. Most people are afraid of failure and adversity, so they stay in their comfort zones and never achieve what they could have. Taking risks is essential if we want to reach potential and have success at anything. Thank you so much for posting. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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