Do Cool Stuff & They Will Come?
During this year, I’ve noticed an interesting (minor) phenomenon. When I was in Mexico & right now in Tanzania, people are naturally curious on how I’m still willing & able to visit/live in foreign countries. This logically invites questions on what I’m about and what I’m up to. I would give a brief run down about it (accountant, author, school teacher, farmer, street musician etc.) and that is when the interesting thing happens.
The women listening or seeing me displaying flashes of budding skills take notice & want to be around me. I won’t go too into detail (plus its only a handful anyways) but its something that has never happened before. This denotes analysis because I never tried to chase any of these women. I mean, I’m interested in them as a man is biologically inclined to be, but my priorities have been seeing things, building more skills with other aspects of life put in the back burner.
The Disposability of Males in the Animal Kingdom
Because going out and making something of yourself is what separates you from the pack. I remember about a year ago mentioning that young men (like myself) are the most disposable members of society. And I’d like to connect that to my experience farming in Mexico.
One day, one of my hosts went and showed me around his complex. When he got to the pigs he had just purchased, of the many things he mentioned, one that stood out was that he mentioned buying 8 females and 2 males for breeding.
Transferring Breeding Tendencies Into Human Civilization
Now we are much more evolved compared to the rest of the animal kingdom, so one male having several female mates is no longer acceptable in most societies. So this biological fact that most men are not needed to procreate & ensure the continuation of civilization permeates into other facets of life.
A few examples, it is young men that are sent to fight and die in wars, another is it is mostly men that become homeless on the streets, women in the same situation or making similar mistakes as the homeless men have more institutions available to protect them.
On the other end of the spectrum, the successful males, rather then having many mates, it’s more subtle in human civilization. It is the accumulation of a combination of social standing, political power and money (money being a social indicator of how much your society values you). The 3 before mentioned takes time to accumulate.
The Choice: Value Creation
So young men having time as one of their most valuable assets, are left with a choice. If they play their cards right, they will accumulate the later leading to women being naturally drawn to them (as all people are drawn to high value people) which lends to the successful man having his pick of a good mate. As I began seeing a very (very ) faint patina of this year in the twilight of my early 20’s (I think)
Alternatively, those that are not so careful and don’t play their cards right end up tossed to the wayside in human civilization or are the remaining 6 male pigs that were not allowed to mate.
The choice is simple, but the execution is exceedingly difficult. Provide value to your society so as other people want to be around you, or end up being 50, 55, 60 and homeless, broke, no woman, no prospects… screwed.
Kingston S. Lim
November 18, 2020
Dar Es Salaam, Tanzania
Kingston S. Lim 
While there are exceptions, many/most 20-somethings don’t make plans and don’t build for the future. They are, particularly in the US, in a “live-for-the-day” survival mode, condemning most of them to a difficult future. Plans may not work out, but the act of planning means that you take inventory and understand what you need to do to prepare for your future, To paraphrase, President Eisenhower, plans are worthless but planning is everything.
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Words are wind, execution is key. Having a plan takes you halfway there. Acting and adjusting your actions is the second half of the equation
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I differ slightly. If you want to accomplish almost anything of value, there is preparation. If unprepared, most actions will fall short. Now one can argue that preparation is itself an action, but knowing what one must do to be prepared is part of the planning process.
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SMiles Wise Words
Indeed My Friend
Give Add
Value
To The
World
And The
World At Least
What Gives
With
Value
Will You
See This Way
No Matter What
Part of The Mountain
Your Valley Will Rise
High
Indeed
Higher
With
Only
Doing More
As Tops Of
Mountains
Remain
Covered
With Ice
No Longer
Burning Within to See🏔🔥
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Kingston, a very interesting post. Biologically, young men may be disposable, but that type of scenario would favor undesirable inbreeding. OK for pigs maybe…
I think young women, as well as young men, are trying to establish themselves through education and career before they decide to settle down and procreate. To most young women, a marriage of equals is the ideal, and they are not simply looking for someone to support them. Most young men don’t want to team up with an uneducated, penniless woman they have to support.
In some countries, some young women may be seeking a path to US citizenship through marriage. Be careful, Kingston; it’s a jungle out there! 🙂
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Hi Cheryl, I expected this post to inspire differing opinions. I don’t necessarily agree with what you think but I respect your thoughts.
And as for the US citizenship thing, that’s a very valid point (you kinda sound like my mom many years ago when I was 20 and an exchange student in China). I will keep that in mind
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