“Why We Have Crabs In Our Society” (Kingston’s Journey #59)

"Why We Have Crabs In Our Society" (Kingston's Journey #59)

The Slush Pile Is The Shortcut

They say everyone has an excuse. Part of the reason being is because it’s so much easier to pin the blame on someone else then to take responsibility. Taking responsibility means admitting you did something wrong (which no one likes to do) in addition to creating a need to break our routines, smash it to chaos and do something else (again no one likes to do as it’s harder and people tend to be lazy by default.)

It takes more effort, a conscious effort, to get up and do something different. It’s easier and safer to stay with the group, everyone else is doing it and they are turning out alright, odds are you will be alright too. 

But like so many things we have inherited from our ancestors (car sickness for one), it can be detrimental at times. People that make the front cover of Times, Entrepreneur or Forbes didn’t get there by being like everyone else. They got there because they did something extraordinary. Yes it is riskier then what most people do, but more often then not, by the appliance of patience, they outlast any obstacles in their way. 

Making It Proves a Point

And those that “make it” (and making it means something different in different fields, but it all boils down to doing something not thought possible) proves a point to everyone that what was done is possible. 

That is where the crabs in a bucket takes its place. The crabs have what they need to get what they want but for whatever reason these crabs refuse to take action. 

Perhaps they are scared, lazy or envious. Whatever the case might be, the fact that other people did something they themselves are capable of proves they are cowards. 

Their lack of initiative is exposed when someone’s sweat reaps fruit. So in order to hid their cowardice, they need to pull others back down. It is a fear that they are being judged by what they ought to be doing but are not. 

And that makes then guilty. 

Handling Cowards

The only thing to be done with such people is to cut them out if your life. If all the suggestions you give them are met with excuses, you can’t help them. You can’t help those that won’t help themselves. 

So get rid of them and their negativity. 

Their words can’t poison you if you are out of earshot (“Oh why are you trying to do X? You’re not good enough”) and more importantly, their actions cannot undermine you if you are far enough away. 

You can't help those that won't help themselves.  Kingston S. Lim

Kingston S. Lim
June 24, 2020
Cancun, Mexico 

Life Update: I’m tired of all this waiting for Latin American borders to reopen. It had been pushed from May to July and possibly passed that before I can farm there. I’m starting to float the idea of skipping this leg of the journey and heading straight to Africa. 


About Kingston’s Journey Series: Kingston’s Journey is a lifelong series. This is the travel journal I take with me. Whether you have questions such as how to change my life or how to travel the world, I think you’ll find value in the life lessons I’ve experienced and documented in this travel notebook. They may serve as travel inspiration for you. In Chinese, there is a saying, “讀萬卷書,不如行千里路.”

This means, instead of reading ten thousand books, why don’t you walk a thousand miles. This is my inspiration to travel every nation (or as many as possible) in my pursuit of my global MBA by learning as much as possible and recording these life lessons learned only by travel. In the end, I think the achievement of dreams, personal growth & aspirations out there through travel and adventure will lead to a more fulfilling life. Living and experiencing the “now” is how I’ll make my life a great memory in the future.

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