I weighed myself today, back up to 125, hard to believe I gained 7 pounds in less than 2 months. All the time I’ve spent with my folk has gotten me soft. I’m also surprised by how quickly my motor skills have deteriorated in Muay Thai. My reaction speed was not quick to begin with, but now it’s grossly slown down as well as my physical conditioning. It sucks right now but this along with any other skill I work into my muscle memory, I believe will quickly come back to me. I won’t be nearly as skilled as the fighters that have been doing this their entire lives, but I can’t make damn good progress. Besides, it ain’t about comparing myself, me against me right?

At the moment, I have more pressing concerns. I overheard my mom telling my cousin that since I’ve graduated, I’ve become a very impatient person. No denying that, right now I feel the sands of time slipping between my fingers and I’m not doing enough. I’m living life as though it will end at 30. As right now it feels like that is all the time I have left to trek the world at in whim and as I reflect, I have a question that still befuddles me:

Age 21: Graduate College Early

Age 22: Author a Book

Age 23: Become a Teacher

Age 24: ?

I’m pushing 24 right now and I don’t know what I’m going to achieve yet. I feel that every year that goes by, I should be accomplishing more and more, it frustrates me that I’m not. So I’ve got to formulate a plot or my chance at life is going to be shot.

Kingston S. Lim

November 2, 2019

Bangkok, Thailand